You Can't Be Dumb Enough To Dream So Big...

...Yes, we can

(You, me and everyone we know)

Oh my goshhh we did recordings today, can you believe it? Not sure if i can! It's pretty much a dream i've had for a really long time. See, since I was about five I've been in a band. It's all i've ever done, and today is a new high point for us. Albiet there were bits of my vocals i really wasn't happy with, the rest of them thought it was "lovely" so I'll trust their opinion.

It all seemed faintly surreal. I'm not really sure how much of what i was feeling i can actually record proficiently enough, but safe to say it was a little bit magical. And a day with those girlies is always a day well spent, they make my cheeks ache.

Its Not The Falling Of The Temperature Thats Making All Our Bones Run Cold...

...its the breeze you make, the presense felt when you're around me

(New Found Glory- Head On Collision)

I'm backkkkk, yet i feel really in no mood to be writing what I had hoped would turn out to be an exciting and inspirational piece of prose published on tinternet. But it sounds bizarre, but I'm back. Me. Truly. I'm not sure if I was really lost, but a piece of me had gone, and feeling faithless was really scary for me, like i wasn't sure how to look at anything, or see anyone properly and i can say 100% that I hope that feeling never comes back. I mean i know it will, just hopefully next time i'll be better equipped to handle it, and force it away even faster. I'd forgotten how much more cluttered my head gets whn i'm not writing here or elsewhere, or talking to people about whats going on with me...so here it goes again, i guess.

I'm really happy with how things are going right now. Like, I'm a little worried I've just jinxed myself uttering that, but i dont care! Planning what should be the acest summer on record, its my birthday in just over a month( ...eeeep!) and just being able to stand here happy with the present (yesss i'm still as neurotic as i have ever been, ive not mellowed in these few months, there's still things about me I want to change, but im working on it...new imporved me should be ready for about april 2009 hehe) and equally happy looking outwards to whatever it is that comes next for me. And for all of us. We've just been paying for our yearbooks and its recently dawned on me, that it about four months this chapter is closed, and things cant ever be the same. I don't think i mean that in a bad way, but its like the bricks and mortar won't hold us together anymore, it'll all be down to us. And dreams have to become reality rather than options we put on our careers guidance sheet.

And yes, quite frankly, its is terrfiying, it's also liberating, i guess.

Man, I'd forgotten how cathartic this is! Well, right now i'm off for a sizable neros caffine hit before heading to school to grovel, plead and cry on my history teacher to have mercy on me and my Civil Rights Coureswork.